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Latest Post: March 11, 2010 at 2:25 AM
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I am not a 14 year old girl, nor a 16 year old one; in fact I’m not even a woman but a guy, so this post isn’t about me. I just saw clip of Taylor Swift which was essentially her as the ugly duckling turning into a white swan to get her guy, who chooses her against the sexy red-dressed devil (I remember a Halloween party where I had to make a similar decision). From some point girls/women constantly face the question of their sexiness.

Sexiness is mostly a choice, a choice to be alluring, a choice to play games. Games can be great, but dating games are mostly awful, but beauty and attraction is still a must. As you can see: but but but but, it’s a tough decision. A decision to take a strange place in the world, and for many women this is a complicated decision to make until their 30s or 40s.

So women, how did you deal with this question of sexiness? A problem of course is you can’t only be sexy to one suitor but have to be sexy to all of them, most of whom you are not interested in, and expose yourself to a constant barrage of being hit on by annoying people.



I think they put up with it. I once stood behind a woman who was dressed very well, by the side of a main road. Her perfume was unusual and I moved closer and inhaled it to determine it's source. A bunch of guys came along cruising in a car. The one in the front passenger seat looked very dark and evil and he glared at her as if she was a piece of meat. I copped the full extent of that glare because I was in the lady's shoes almost. Being right behind in dim light I was hard to see. This look was a criminal act I was convinced, one wanted to call the police. The lights changed and we walked across. As I moved aside and passed her I was going to say don't worry because she would surely feel dreadful but her expression was neutral, she had already moved on. She had to have seen it. I was quite surprised and it was then and there I understood women probably put up with that all day. Can any women on here comment from your own experience? I would like to know. I promise not to stand behind and check out the perfume!


Mia Vialti says: (Follow this user)            In response to Martin Howells

Yes, women have to put up with being objectified all the time.


To be the third guy in this discussion, for those who speak french, a lesson in becoming sexy:



The question is, who is giving the lesson?
The scene is from Alain Resnais' marvelously brilliant and hilarious Pas sur la bouche

Films Discussed

Not on the Lips


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This topic continues in the following branching discussions:

Becoming sexy - Avoiding over-sexy

  
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